This untitled pendant has been the source of much angst and also much excitement. It's the introductory manifestation of a significant yet frightening chapter in my life to come. All along I've been wanting to get my jewelry business off the ground and start a semi-fine and precious jewelry line. Truthfully, my own dreams frighten me. I'm not so sure if it's success I fear so much as it is the fear of failure. This untitled pendant has been sitting around for months waiting to be completed, to be touched for that matter. Finally, just a few days ago I finished it! Instead of feeling relieved I feel anxiety on some twisted level. During all those months of procrastinating and making up excuses, I was convincing myself I didn't have all the tools (or capacity) to complete the task.
I understand now what that procrastination really was, completing the pendant marking in my mind accountability. That once I was able to successfully metalsmith something I would then have no excuse for not going further with jewelry-making. Metalsmithing is my passion, what I intend to do in life, meeting that at the front door scared me. So putting off this piece meant putting off that challenge to rise to the occasion. Putting off rising to the occasion meant deviating failure. How do I know my products will sell? That was one of my largest concerns that I wanted to avoid dealing with.
On a lighter, brighter, and more optimistic note, I am going to push past that fear that has crippled my ability to be productive. Last but not least, I finally finished the pendant and (though I see all the errors) I think it looks pretty great! My plans now are to start a high price-point line of semi-fine jewelry. For now they will only be brass, however, I do at some point plan to venture out into sterling silver and MAYBE gold. For 2014 my greatest desire is to become more productive and insh'allah (God willing) my business will be a healthy reflection of that and grow with me. ❤
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